This will not be a pleasant discussion, however, it is time that this topic be addressed and solutions explored. I have contemplated this conundrum for many hours and I challenge you to do the same. Humor me as I lay it out for you.
The powers that be have come upon a grand invention. I am talking about toilet seat covers that are readily available in any number of public toilets. Those thin layers of paper protect our delicate bottoms from various forms of uncleanliness. It is likely that they maintain a barrier against untold disease and bacteria. Not to mention a calmness in knowing that something is between us and the cold ceramic throne.
I believe we can do more to maintain this high standard of excellence. Something to protect our fragile fannies from being splashed by the liquid lurking in the depths of the bowl. We've all been there. Making a #2, dropping the duce, turning the prairie dog loose and of course, making fudge. The residual "splash" is extremely unpleasant and so very hygienically challenged. We need more paper, more protection, more bowl.
Something seemingly simple has escaped the great minds of our generation. I am begging for an innovative concept to make our potties perfect, splash free and oh so dry.
Who is willing to step up and make my dream a reality?
oh my goodness I can't stop laughing! I am with you...especially because when Kaleb poops he likes me to read him a story, so I sit in front of the bowl. Last week, he did such a big poop that the splash hit me in the face! He laughed hysterically while I scrubbed my face with a Brillo pad and scalding hot water!!!
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