He was the proverbial perfect guy. He would carry her books for her and walk her to class. Should it be raining, he would meet her at the car with an umbrella to make sure she was kept dry. He gave her frequent bouquets of her favorite flower, orchids. He wrote her many love letters. He would bring her a half and half from the gas station on cold, winter mornings. She received the coveted aqua box on special occasions. He opened doors for her including car doors. He would pull out chairs at tables. She didn't want or need more.
A very strict young Mormon.
I, too, fell for a young man when I was 16 and we dated for 8 years off and on. He whisked me off my feet, as well. I once received a dozen roses, each one with a poem attached, delivered to our doorstep with nary a clue from whence they came. It took 2 hours for me to gather them with the final poem stating whom they were from. He once wrote a love letter to me and published it in the school newspaper. We would go on picnics, packed by him, and take long walks in the mountains. And yes, he opened all the proper doors and would pull out all the necessary chairs.
I said good bye to him and sent him on his mission. I was 18, he the 19 year old elder, and decided that was it. Not so. He came home and we reconnected. I just couldn't say farewell to him and it seemed he could not cut me out of his life either. I was mesmerized. He said all the right things and did everything a young girl desires.
One evening, during the holiday season, he took me to Temple Square in downtown Salt Lake City. It is beautiful during this time of year. The lights and the whole area is spectacular. He set me on one of the many benches in a lovely garden. It was snowing lightly. He said to me with the most heart felt quiver in his voice and a small box in his hand, "Cindy, I love you with all my heart. I want to marry you in that Temple, but I must ask you to convert to Mormonism. Will you do me that honor?" With my heart breaking, knowing the answer I had to give, I choked out sobbingly, "I can't."
A very strict young Mormon.
It must be said that at the time I had also been dating Scott and knew he was the one man of my true hearts desire, but I did, at one time, love Lynn and still felt unbearable agony about treating him the way I knew I must. A clean break. It was the last time I ever saw him.
Another person close to my heart, dated a young man from her high school days as well. They reconnected after he came home from his mission. He had expressed to her that he had fallen in love with her and had decided to join our church and marry her. Scott did their premarital counseling and was asked to do the wedding. He placed membership and the wedding date was set for a beautiful December ceremony. From that day forward, he did not attend church with her and insisted she attend Sacrament Meeting with him. She was devastated. She felt betrayed and misled and rightly so. There was very little intimacy in their relationship and their union was annulled after 2 months.
A very strict young Mormon.
Why do we as young women fall for manipulation of this kind from young men? Are we in such need for affection and affirmation that we seek it out wherever we can find it no matter what the cost? Or are these young Mormon men taught from a very tender age how to manipulate and entice a woman of their said dreams and then marry her to their Mormon bed? They are all good guys . . . and then they aren't.
Mama's don't let your babies grow up and date Mormons.
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